“Don’t go around saying the world owes you a living. The world owes you nothing. It was here first.”
“Giving up smoking is the easiest thing in the world. I know because I’ve done it thousands of times.”
“It were not best that we should all think alike; it is difference of opinion that makes horse races.”
“My books are like water; those of the great geniuses are wine. (Fortunately) everybody drinks water.”
“Only kings, presidents, editors, and people with tapeworms have the right to use the editorial ‘we.’”
“When a person cannot deceive himself the chances are against his being able to deceive other people.”